Saturday, March 20, 2010

People who need people are the luckiest people in the world.....

The last time I entered a posting was December 6th.....I had had the most glorious phone call with my dear friend Lorene and then jumped onto the blog to write. We talked again a few days later. We burst into this unabashed gushing over each other, just laughing and rejoicing over the connection with each other, so grateful for having each other in our lives. The evening of the 16th, a little after 5pm, I checked my emails....I had 2 emails timed between 1:10 and 1:18pm from Lorene's and her husband's blackberrys, asking me to call immediately. I tried Phil's number first, no answer, then her home phone. I call Chris to see if he had talked with Lorene, which he did not. I sit down in the library foyer, across from a poster entitled "Pray for those who have died...World Aids Peace Day" or something like that....a shiver went through me...I knew it was confirmation of what I felt in my gut. I dailed Lorene's number and reached one of her young daughters who, in shock, told me her mother had just passed away.....in reading the obituary weeks later, it noted Lorene's time of death as 5:21pm. I checked my phone records a few days later, my call was at 5:24pm.

Our friendship was the bright star in my life, showing me pure connection with someone in just the 4 months we physically shared on this earth. We never met face to face, we found common ground through our discussions of life, death, German New Medicine, family and personal issues. An unlikely pair...she a midwest republican, married with children, christian; me a buddhist/pagan/whatever, single lesbian. We understood the midwest upbringing and mindset, we shared a similar path of coming to grips with the reality of this dominant western medical paradigm and its fearing/panic modus operandi, we loved having the GNM connection and talking about how we had seen our lives change with understanding the biological laws.

Life takes its own course. People come into our lives at any given time and slip through and away as well. Some we really have a tremendously positive connection, others it is "negative," many connections are seemingly of no meaning. Yet, with everyone, at least in my experience, there is growth there because of the relationship, if I am open to it.

Lorene's death was very hard. That evening, after the news, I cried so intensely, from my core. And, I also had this feeling of immense love move into me, immense joy for our connection, and knew that she and I had allowed ourselves to see the truth of each other: that we are One. I had finals in two days, and heard something Lorene had told me in one of our conversations...."Mariah, I love watching you grow through this going back to school." I dedicated the rest of my study and test taking to Lorene, in gratitude for the spirit of support she gave me that fall.

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